Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Kobe Schmoe-bee

Stop the eff'ing presses people, it seems Kobe Bryant has .......*gasp!*


"Say it ain't SO, Kobe?!"

Well ain't it just freakin' wonderful, mothers and fathers of America? Another high-profile athlete/celebrity has circumvented the legal process by dipping into their highly overcompensated wallets and making whatever the "problem du jour" was go away (albeit, in a brand new fully-loaded Mercedes, sporting a chunk of diamond that could straighten the hair on a Hasidic Jew). Great, just the kind of example I want my boys to absorb.

Now, it's too early in the morning for me to get wound up about anything, but this is the kind of shit that makes me friggen' crazy..... so here goes.

First of all, some daffy-ass talking-head sports commentators (read: former athletes who for some reason, no-one has ever told to just shut the fuck up because us intelligent people shouldn't have to be burdened with the "thoughts'' that clunk around in their empty fucking heads) was asked if we should "read anything into the fact that Kobe settled out of court".

These numbnuts replies were along the lines of, "blah blah blah, no, just because he settled, blah blah blah, no proof of guilt, blah blah blah, just avoiding the negative publicity, blah blah blah, still a good guy" etc.....

It was at this point that my head nearly exploded.

Now I'm no detective, but I know when I'm being jerked-off and told it was a blow-job.


Paying somebody off to avoid ''negative publicity" is NOT what an innocent person does!!!

I explained it to my 10yr. old thusly, "Son, our last name was handed to me spotlessly clean by my father, who had received it spotlessly clean from his father, and his father before him. I have lived my life in such a way as to not dirty it or leave a black mark upon it. NOT ON MY WATCH. Just remember that when you are faced with a tough decision son, it'll help you to see your way clear someday."

I also explained to him that:
1) Honest people want all the facts to be heard, LOUDLY and for all to hear, so there is NO residue left clinging to their names. Dishonest people "use" the legal system to squash the truth, misrepresent the facts, and hide behind legal smoke and mirrors to snake their way through the law.
2) If you have to have more than one attorney represent you in a legal matter, you may have already "screwed the pooch" as far as keeping your name clean.
3) Your actions speak louder than your words, let them speak clearly and concisely so as to leave no misunderstandings.
4) Honest men accused of murder don't keep $10,000 in cash, a gun, and a disguise in their glovebox while "going out for a drive" to Mexico.
5) They also don't "promise to keep looking for the real killers" (when evidently the trail leads to golf courses all over South Florida).
6) They don't invite young boys to sleep over so that they can "gift" them millions of dollars in a few years.
7) They don't hire Johnny Cochran, unless of course you're Latrell Sprewell. (which somebody forgot to inform Latrell after the famous choking incident, "first you KILL P.J. Carlissimo, THEN you hire Johnny Cochran").
8) No matter what people "get away with" in this life, someday we will all face a court in which there is no way to hide from the justice we deserve. And ain't no lawyer gonna save your ass there. So live right and nothing or no-one will ever steal your sleep.

My boy seems to "get it", he has already shown that he is a champion of the underdog, a defender of those who are unable to defend themselves, the kind of kid who helps anybody that has a need. Believe me, I'd love to be able to take credit for it, but most of it comes from the very core of his skinny little mutt soul, lol.

I think our name is in good hands.

(It's just gonna take a few years for him to be able to fit into the tights and the cape, little fucker eats like a bird, lol)