Tuesday, March 29, 2005


Okay, now I've freakin' HAD it. After hearing another moronic camera-whore expound his idiotic "thoughts" on Terry Schiavos husband, (for the millionth time) the rubber-band that holds in my venomous sarcastic streak, snapped in half like a lawnchair at Rush Limbaughs house.
When did the television news media just throw up their hands and say "Fuck it, don't even worry about reporting 'news', just get us some ratings!"

I'm reasonably sure that the founding fathers of this country crafted the First Amendment to protect FREE SPEECH, not to protect some fucking idiot from using mass media to SPECULATE "that Terry Schiavos husband wants her remains cremated quickly to prevent an autopsy that would show he strangled her 15 yrs. ago."


I can easily understand how some jerkoff could have a wildly speculative "conspiracy theory". I can also understand (given the highly emotionally charged atmosphere surrounding her case) that there would be quite alot of news coverage about the case. What I cannot possibly understand is the way the networks are 'covering' this case. Doesn't it bother you when you feel like you're being spoon-fed information 'bytes' designed specifically just to hold your attention? Does this type of "news" reporting offend anyone else, or is it just me? It's getting to where I can't even stand to read a newspaper, much less watch the "news" on the boob tube. Seriously listen to the tone and content of these so-called 'newspeople' and you'll begin to feel like you're watching a penny arcade puppet show.

It's called "sensationalistic journalism" folks, and it's brought to you by all those "marketing majors" you went to college with. You remember them don'tcha? A little too smart not to go to college, but too damn lazy to get a degree in something they actually had to work for. They're the ones that are partially to blame for our sad, sad, state of affairs nowadays.

You see, almost everything we do nowadays, is tracked and recorded by a 'marketing survey' of some kind. Every google search term, every story clicked on any online news source or website, even blog entries are subject to "marketing searches". It's all being kept track of people.
I'll give you a prime example. How does a no-talent like Ashlee "dimwit" S!mpson even begin to have a career, when musicians and singers w/ TEN times her talent barely earn enough to survive playing in bars and clubs?


This daffy little bitch has her own television show! Granted, it's only on EMP-TY-V, which isn't exactly CNN, but It scares the shit outta me when I envision how many kids in this country are being 'brainwashed' by that pathetic no-talent skank. Of course she's not the first 'pre-manufactured pop-slut-du-jour', nor will she be the last. But I'll be damned if my kids won't know that Jessica Simpson is a joke compared to Aretha Franklin, or why Bob Dylan and John Hiatt are two of the most covered songwriters ever. (Reason: neither is known for being a 'singer', but man can they WRITE a song that blazes right through your "outer bullshit", to get right into the center of your being). But, nowadays very few record labels (record? whaddat?) would dare to take a chance on somebody based on talent alone. The Marketing Dept. says they gotta have a certain "look" too.

So, lets just list a few of the bands/musicians that changed rock music as we know it, but couldn't get signed in this day and age because they "didn't test well in the marketing survey assigned to their demographic"

1) The Beatles: "two frontmen are terrific, lead guitarist okay, but drummer might as well be replaced with drunken muppet"
2) The Mamas and the Papas: "great harmonies but catering bill would be astronomical unless label purchased stock in pork futures and tie-dyed t-shirts"
3) Bob Dylan: "hire immediately for songwriting ability, destroy every vocal microphone in studio or else"
4) Pink Floyd: "shows potential but actually tested BELOW negative w/ anyone who has ever heard of hip-hop"
5) Janis Joplin: "GREAT voice, face hit by train, recommended only for commercial jingles and voice-overs for liquor ads"
6) Jimi Hendrix: "tests high w/ white males, over the TOP w/ white females, but curiosly very low amongst black people surveyed, only exception being black males who listed their current profession as "drug dealers"

See what I'm gettin' at? The blind pursuit of the almighty dollar has fucking RUINED music. Ruined any chance of un-biased news coverage, and turned television into one huge game of copy-cat copy-cat (think "mtv's real world", which begat "survivor" which begat clone after clone of "reality" schlock)

So, as you all can tell, I am sick and fucking tired of having all this pre-manufactured, pre-processed, cookie-cutter, snappy sound-byte, tailor-made for a specific 'demographic' shit being shoveled in my direction.

We're being spoon-fed HORSESHIT people, and it's time to start spitting it back in somebodys face!!

I'm whiskytangofoxtrot, and I approved this message.